Saturday, June 26, 2010
Jeffrey Gets his Texas Lexus
Watch Out! Jeff is now hacking into the monkey's site and adding his own perspective...well, at least putting some pics of my new car. 2001 Lexus LS 430. It's pretty stylish and I have been waiting a long time for it. The last picture is of the control panel in the back seat. For those fortunate enough to be picked up in this Japanese limo, you will be treated to to a heated, massage with power reclining seats and a cooler for that frosty adult beverage! I am not kidding...it has a 6 pack cooler in the back seat. Of course I purchased the car with Robert & Zoe's apple juice in mind...did I mention yet that they are not allowed in this car for at least the first 60 days?
Thursday, June 24, 2010
Houston Children's Museum
So many things happen in a young *ahem* mother's life to make her copmletely question her sanity.
Robert has been asking for MONTHS to go to the nyouseum (that's Children's Museum for those not fluent in Robert speak.) This is a museum designed for kids. SURELY, I can handle two kids in 90,000 sf of kid proof museum. Right?
Before I go further, let's talk money. If you go to the museum 3 times in a year, it's worth it to buy a membership. This is the second time this year, so I'm thinking this is a better deal. Plus, you can sign up online. That's a bonus for when you're arriving at the museum with 2 rambunctious kids. Now Jeff, big spoil sport he is, says I should go, buy a normal day pass then at the end buy the membership if I still want it since they will refund your day pass money if you purchase the same day.
My response? He must be completely insane. Has he not seen what it is to take two children out in public?
His response? Just plan to save a little time at the end, before the kids are completely wound up, to go back to admissions counter.
I, of course, completely dismiss his 'logic' as a pile of poo. He clearly does not have enough experience in this category. Maybe some day I will tell everyone about the Chick Fil A incident of 2010.
And off we go. Both kids are dressed (go mom!), I'm dressed, and we're in the car with our shiny new membership and directions. I would say we are fed, but I'm pretty sure Robert only ate one bite of breakfast before he decided green peppers were clearly food for heathen.
A bit more traffic than I would have cared for, but thanks to the miracles of modern technology and Elmo, the ride was not all that bad.
And we arrive! Woohoo! Yippee! Finally!
Robert is in complete amazement. He can barely be contained he is so excited. But mommy, in all her wisdom, kept on course. Upstairs, they have a 'Tot Spot.' A place for wild, I mean curious and active, children like mine can be contained while they explore. We navigate through the crowds and excitement, up the elevator, take off our shoes and...
DENIED! That's right. The tot spot is exceptionally busy. So only children 35 months and under are allowed to enter. Robert barely passes as 3, apparently he's a huge 3 yr old. Now I'm starting to get irked.
AND there's a camera crew there. I duck my head. They're interviewing people about crib recalls. No, no not me. Neither of my kids use a crib. They're on the floor. Plus I'm still a little pissy about being denied entrance to the place I just drove 45 minutes to play in. But no, the man says, people want to know about that, please just let us ask a couple of questions.
Well, the problem with me is that I will talk to anyone. So of course I start blabbing about kids and sleeping and all my theories on parenting. And some guy with a camera and I'm sure unflattering bright light, videos me. And by theories I mean, do whatever is easiest (the lazy part of my theory,) and what gets me the most sleep.
Question guy says, "You should write a book." Hahahaha.
Meanwhile, Robert is sobbing because he can't go look at the telescope. Gee I hope they got that on camera too.
We make our way downstairs, and filter outside to the waterworks area. This is fun, except Robert is still completely excited and running in circles. And then, while playing with the water, pees his pants. Now, part of me says, who cares? He's half wet anyway. But the other part of me says, if you can't go to the potty, you have to leave.
More crying.
We eat lunch in the car, do a complete outfit change for Robert (go mommy for having a complete change down to the shoes) go back in for 15 minutes, just to try and salvage the disaster. Then leave.
As I'm driving home, and Robert is singing the classics to me (small and giant, big and giant, small and giant, etc. Your guess is as good as mine,) I can't help but think about the day.
Then I remember... the interview. For the love of... why did I do that? You know how you watch people on TV and think, WHY would you go on TV looking like that? Oh yes. In the background the beautiful blond with impeccable makeup and clothes was watching me and my sobbing children. She is who they will see first. Then me, sweaty, clinging kids and a little pissy. Great.
Next time I'm going to IKEA. Oh wait, I bought a year membership! We get to go back! TWO MORE TIMES! All because I ridiculed my husband and his day pass idea. So on top of it all, Jeff, you were right.
Robert has been asking for MONTHS to go to the nyouseum (that's Children's Museum for those not fluent in Robert speak.) This is a museum designed for kids. SURELY, I can handle two kids in 90,000 sf of kid proof museum. Right?
Before I go further, let's talk money. If you go to the museum 3 times in a year, it's worth it to buy a membership. This is the second time this year, so I'm thinking this is a better deal. Plus, you can sign up online. That's a bonus for when you're arriving at the museum with 2 rambunctious kids. Now Jeff, big spoil sport he is, says I should go, buy a normal day pass then at the end buy the membership if I still want it since they will refund your day pass money if you purchase the same day.
My response? He must be completely insane. Has he not seen what it is to take two children out in public?
His response? Just plan to save a little time at the end, before the kids are completely wound up, to go back to admissions counter.
I, of course, completely dismiss his 'logic' as a pile of poo. He clearly does not have enough experience in this category. Maybe some day I will tell everyone about the Chick Fil A incident of 2010.
And off we go. Both kids are dressed (go mom!), I'm dressed, and we're in the car with our shiny new membership and directions. I would say we are fed, but I'm pretty sure Robert only ate one bite of breakfast before he decided green peppers were clearly food for heathen.
A bit more traffic than I would have cared for, but thanks to the miracles of modern technology and Elmo, the ride was not all that bad.
And we arrive! Woohoo! Yippee! Finally!
Robert is in complete amazement. He can barely be contained he is so excited. But mommy, in all her wisdom, kept on course. Upstairs, they have a 'Tot Spot.' A place for wild, I mean curious and active, children like mine can be contained while they explore. We navigate through the crowds and excitement, up the elevator, take off our shoes and...
DENIED! That's right. The tot spot is exceptionally busy. So only children 35 months and under are allowed to enter. Robert barely passes as 3, apparently he's a huge 3 yr old. Now I'm starting to get irked.
AND there's a camera crew there. I duck my head. They're interviewing people about crib recalls. No, no not me. Neither of my kids use a crib. They're on the floor. Plus I'm still a little pissy about being denied entrance to the place I just drove 45 minutes to play in. But no, the man says, people want to know about that, please just let us ask a couple of questions.
Well, the problem with me is that I will talk to anyone. So of course I start blabbing about kids and sleeping and all my theories on parenting. And some guy with a camera and I'm sure unflattering bright light, videos me. And by theories I mean, do whatever is easiest (the lazy part of my theory,) and what gets me the most sleep.
Question guy says, "You should write a book." Hahahaha.
Meanwhile, Robert is sobbing because he can't go look at the telescope. Gee I hope they got that on camera too.
We make our way downstairs, and filter outside to the waterworks area. This is fun, except Robert is still completely excited and running in circles. And then, while playing with the water, pees his pants. Now, part of me says, who cares? He's half wet anyway. But the other part of me says, if you can't go to the potty, you have to leave.
More crying.
We eat lunch in the car, do a complete outfit change for Robert (go mommy for having a complete change down to the shoes) go back in for 15 minutes, just to try and salvage the disaster. Then leave.
As I'm driving home, and Robert is singing the classics to me (small and giant, big and giant, small and giant, etc. Your guess is as good as mine,) I can't help but think about the day.
Then I remember... the interview. For the love of... why did I do that? You know how you watch people on TV and think, WHY would you go on TV looking like that? Oh yes. In the background the beautiful blond with impeccable makeup and clothes was watching me and my sobbing children. She is who they will see first. Then me, sweaty, clinging kids and a little pissy. Great.
Next time I'm going to IKEA. Oh wait, I bought a year membership! We get to go back! TWO MORE TIMES! All because I ridiculed my husband and his day pass idea. So on top of it all, Jeff, you were right.
Friday, June 18, 2010
Old MacDonald Robert Style
Old MacDonald had a farm, ee ii ee ii oooooo
On that farm he had a.... backhoe loader! ee ii ee ii oooo
With a push dirt and push dirt
On that farm he had a SCRAPER ee iiiii eeeee ii ooooooooo
On that farm he had a GIANT excavator ee ii ee ii ooo (I guess he gave up on the rest of the song after that!)
On that farm he had a.... backhoe loader! ee ii ee ii oooo
With a push dirt and push dirt
On that farm he had a SCRAPER ee iiiii eeeee ii ooooooooo
On that farm he had a GIANT excavator ee ii ee ii ooo (I guess he gave up on the rest of the song after that!)
Thursday, June 17, 2010
Car shopping, step one
Me: I was thinking we should go look at the car Daddy wants to buy today.
Robert: Oooh, maybe a monster truck car! Daddy LOVES monster trucks. Maybe he will let me ride in the monster truck with him.
Let me just run that past Daddy, Robert. I'm sure he will agree that he would rather be driving a monster truck to work.
Robert: Oooh, maybe a monster truck car! Daddy LOVES monster trucks. Maybe he will let me ride in the monster truck with him.
Let me just run that past Daddy, Robert. I'm sure he will agree that he would rather be driving a monster truck to work.
Wednesday, June 16, 2010
Unsolved Mysteries
#1 What is the best way to remove large quantities of waterproof mascara off of skin, clothes and cabinets?
I'm voting for baby oil, but I have to admit that the pj's are still black. This is still unsolved.
#2 If you leave piles of dirty laundry around, will the laundry fairy really come?
I was suspicious. The pile of whites left on my bedroom floor mysteriously disappeared. Normally, I would blame the kids and expect to find clothing shoved into inappropriate places.
But you know I have an awesome husband. By awesome I mean he just nods and smiles at most of my crazy schemes. When I mention the the missing laundry, he says, "It smelled clean?"
Really? Who saw that coming? Jeff put away dirty clothes?! (No, I am not going to say he folded anything, because when I opened his drawer it was quit obvious what was 'dirty.') I guess he gets points for trying?
Case solved.
I'm voting for baby oil, but I have to admit that the pj's are still black. This is still unsolved.
#2 If you leave piles of dirty laundry around, will the laundry fairy really come?
I was suspicious. The pile of whites left on my bedroom floor mysteriously disappeared. Normally, I would blame the kids and expect to find clothing shoved into inappropriate places.
But you know I have an awesome husband. By awesome I mean he just nods and smiles at most of my crazy schemes. When I mention the the missing laundry, he says, "It smelled clean?"
Really? Who saw that coming? Jeff put away dirty clothes?! (No, I am not going to say he folded anything, because when I opened his drawer it was quit obvious what was 'dirty.') I guess he gets points for trying?
Case solved.
Thursday, June 10, 2010
Saturday, June 5, 2010
Time for the 'vacation hangover'
And it's all over. Jen, Seth & kids are almost home (we hope! we all know how fun the drive home is :)
Part of the final day (more swimming of course!)
Friday, June 4, 2010
Alright, camera is at golf course this morning for all you wondering.
I'm not sure we have any pics anyway so let's paint a little verbal picture of how the day went down.
Kids are playing as usual when Robert falls flat on the wood bed and busts his lip. He still has quite a tough guy look about him :)
Jeff & Seth then went to work on replacing the second screen door on the patio. (I will admit- looks pretty good!) Jen and I were anxious to take advantage of some alone mommy time, but sneaky Jeff suggests that they put the door in first, then I get the kids down for naps before leaving. They totally got the easy end of the bargain! 4 kids for the work of 2!
Then Uncle Jeff suggests that we play playdoh. Why do I hate playdoh do much? I can't describe. The mess? The crazy toys? Not sure, but we made it through with only minimal mess in the kitchen and Zoe only ate a tiny bit.
Jen and I finally escaped. We went straight for mani's and pedi's (we look hot), got some fancy coffee and a snack and even used some of our mommy time to run my the grocery. That's just what kind of awesomeness we are to our men :)
Then it was back to the mommy work. We made pizza dough and let the kids make their own pizzas. I think the adults thought it was cooler than the kids. Robert has no idea. He just ate all his cheese straight from the bowl. Ah, so much to learn.
Another big green bath in the garden tub for Jordan, Robert and Zoe, while Jacob took his own shower (he's such a big man you know.)
And FINALLY, we left. That's right. Grandma Cookie took over ALL the kids, and the parents left. To Perry's Steakhouse. As predicted, even Seth could not finish the AMAZING pork chop. It was the perfect meal for the adults to have some adult time. Big kudos to Grandma Cookie. The fried seafood stuffed mushrooms got rave reviews as well. Even the escargot was a hit. And the chopped salad? May be as close to food heaven as you can get in a salad.
Alright, been discovered. Think I need to throw some kids in the pool before we strap them in for Chick Fil-A lunch.
I'm not sure we have any pics anyway so let's paint a little verbal picture of how the day went down.
Kids are playing as usual when Robert falls flat on the wood bed and busts his lip. He still has quite a tough guy look about him :)
Jeff & Seth then went to work on replacing the second screen door on the patio. (I will admit- looks pretty good!) Jen and I were anxious to take advantage of some alone mommy time, but sneaky Jeff suggests that they put the door in first, then I get the kids down for naps before leaving. They totally got the easy end of the bargain! 4 kids for the work of 2!
Then Uncle Jeff suggests that we play playdoh. Why do I hate playdoh do much? I can't describe. The mess? The crazy toys? Not sure, but we made it through with only minimal mess in the kitchen and Zoe only ate a tiny bit.
Jen and I finally escaped. We went straight for mani's and pedi's (we look hot), got some fancy coffee and a snack and even used some of our mommy time to run my the grocery. That's just what kind of awesomeness we are to our men :)
Then it was back to the mommy work. We made pizza dough and let the kids make their own pizzas. I think the adults thought it was cooler than the kids. Robert has no idea. He just ate all his cheese straight from the bowl. Ah, so much to learn.
Another big green bath in the garden tub for Jordan, Robert and Zoe, while Jacob took his own shower (he's such a big man you know.)
And FINALLY, we left. That's right. Grandma Cookie took over ALL the kids, and the parents left. To Perry's Steakhouse. As predicted, even Seth could not finish the AMAZING pork chop. It was the perfect meal for the adults to have some adult time. Big kudos to Grandma Cookie. The fried seafood stuffed mushrooms got rave reviews as well. Even the escargot was a hit. And the chopped salad? May be as close to food heaven as you can get in a salad.
Alright, been discovered. Think I need to throw some kids in the pool before we strap them in for Chick Fil-A lunch.
Thursday, June 3, 2010
Galveston Beach Trip
Yesterday was the big Galveston beach trip. The natives, of Houston that is, may turn their nose up at Galveston, but I love it. The kids dug, swam, ate sand and flew the kite then came home exhausted.
We did have a massive splinter removal event. And Zoe wasn't exactly happy about car riding yesterday. But there's nothing like a few hours of sing-alongs in the car to give your voice a workout. At least we found the country legends radio station to save us. You can only sing Old McDonald Had a Farm so many times. Why are all these kid songs so short?!
The other lesson of the day is that the only thing nicer than having a beach house, is having friends with beach houses! Ah... to shower before heading back. In my book, that may be heaven.
They look ready for a long car ride, don't they?
Ahoy, I see a bird
Jen made fun of the hat, but I think she looks pretty sexy ;)
Jordan even got to experience the ice cream truck on the beach. She was pretty pleased!
Jordan modeling the beach hat
View from the deck of our beach house for the day :) (Thanks Ambra!)
That's right kids... run run run. Only 1.5 hours in the car after this.
We did have a massive splinter removal event. And Zoe wasn't exactly happy about car riding yesterday. But there's nothing like a few hours of sing-alongs in the car to give your voice a workout. At least we found the country legends radio station to save us. You can only sing Old McDonald Had a Farm so many times. Why are all these kid songs so short?!
The other lesson of the day is that the only thing nicer than having a beach house, is having friends with beach houses! Ah... to shower before heading back. In my book, that may be heaven.
They look ready for a long car ride, don't they?
Ahoy, I see a bird
Jen made fun of the hat, but I think she looks pretty sexy ;)
Jordan even got to experience the ice cream truck on the beach. She was pretty pleased!
Jordan modeling the beach hat
View from the deck of our beach house for the day :) (Thanks Ambra!)
That's right kids... run run run. Only 1.5 hours in the car after this.
Tuesday, June 1, 2010
Just in case anyone besides Suzanne is wondering, we have visitors! Jeff's sister and brother-in-law and 2 kids are gracing us with their presence. They drove. Listen, Texas is a big state, and we are WAY down here. That's real love folks :)
Anyway, we had a few days of sun & fun. That's right, we are just a party waiting to happen over here. We even managed to get all the kids in the bathtub at once (Jacob is so good to the little ones! Although he decided the big crazy bath was mainly for little kids the next night :)- See previous post for the evidence)
We had to take a short break from the pool, and save the shoulders from certain sunburn, so the boys headed off to the Astros game and the girls went to IKEA.
Robert was so excited to see his 'glub' that Jacob brought for him.
Jordan and Zoe enjoying story time. (Notice Zoe is totally blue from the delicious ring pop she stole from Robert!)
Zoe testing out couches at IKEA...
Jordan testing couches in a more 'lady-like fashion.
More chair testing. (Someone should hire her! I think she sat on every chair. Maybe it's a Goldilocks thing)
Jordan making sure we got a good photo of her fabulous nails and new flower
Ah, the foam finger..
And today, Jeff has some work plans. Apparently Robert and I aren't much help when it comes to his house projects so he's planning on taking advantage of Seth while he is here. We're planning on paying him in beer, so hopefully that's enough motivation :)
And we may venture out for Mexican. Because what would a trip to Houston be without Mexican food?!
Anyway, we had a few days of sun & fun. That's right, we are just a party waiting to happen over here. We even managed to get all the kids in the bathtub at once (Jacob is so good to the little ones! Although he decided the big crazy bath was mainly for little kids the next night :)- See previous post for the evidence)
We had to take a short break from the pool, and save the shoulders from certain sunburn, so the boys headed off to the Astros game and the girls went to IKEA.
Robert was so excited to see his 'glub' that Jacob brought for him.
Jordan and Zoe enjoying story time. (Notice Zoe is totally blue from the delicious ring pop she stole from Robert!)
Zoe testing out couches at IKEA...
Jordan testing couches in a more 'lady-like fashion.
More chair testing. (Someone should hire her! I think she sat on every chair. Maybe it's a Goldilocks thing)
Jordan making sure we got a good photo of her fabulous nails and new flower
Ah, the foam finger..
And today, Jeff has some work plans. Apparently Robert and I aren't much help when it comes to his house projects so he's planning on taking advantage of Seth while he is here. We're planning on paying him in beer, so hopefully that's enough motivation :)
And we may venture out for Mexican. Because what would a trip to Houston be without Mexican food?!
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