The funny floaty suit

Several years ago, a neighbor cleaned out their toddler stuff and left me with a bag of miscellaneous toys. In that bag, a bizarre swim suit hid. Somehow this suit managed to move with us again and again, until, like a treasure, it was discovered by Robert.



Reminds me a little of a 1920's circus performer.

Robert requested to wear the 'funny floaty suit' EVERY DAY. It was painful to see. Plus it looks like it rides up :)



So we moved up in the world to funny floaty suit world, to muscle man suit


And super hero status was set back in order :)

Sage advice

Not really. Who are we kidding, it's me. But seriously, I'm collecting advice that you should have been given instead of the random worthless advice such as, "Your life will never be the same." In fact, I'm still not sure what to make of that gem.

I've blocked most of the other random non-parent parent advice I've been given. But I think some things like this would have been more helpful.

1. Chemistry is important. You need to know how things react together and what solutions are poisonous. Like highlighters and markers. Say a one-yr old eats the tips off of 5 markers. Should you worry?

Or, say you're cruising on the beltway, er... toll road in some random state, at rush hour with 2 small kids because your husband found some crazy car in a warehouse somewhere that he just has to have, and a 3 yr old says they have to potty. You then have a crucial few minutes to find a nasty bathroom in a gas station Jack-in-the-Box next to a racetrack to take said children. Then you will probably be mom-pressured into buying chocolate milkshakes hoping to make it the last 23 minutes in peace. Then the 1 yr old will throw the milkshake to the side after only drinking about 2 tablespoons, because we know it's probably not milk and whatever they do to that stuff makes it impossibly thick. The milkshake will land upside down in the backseat with 11 minutes of screaming left to home.

The chemistry question is... How much of that milkshake will melt into the seat in 11 minutes? And will turning the ambient temp of the car down to 60 slow the inevitable melt down? And since you won't be stopping to rescue the milkshake, will your car cleaning husband catch you sopping up the milkshake from the carpet and seat? Okay, that last one is more of a risk analysis than chemistry.

Pics from a Golf Outing

So, Mike Underwood and Jeffrey went and played Tour 18, which is a golf course in Houston that has replicas of famous PGA Tournament Holes. Some pics below. It was a balmy 97 on July 4th when we took the tee. Bloody Marys, stogies and Jeff's new Cleveland irons helped kick the morning in properly. Highlights of the round include a 39 by Jeff with a birdie on the 9th hole (which is the famous 17th island green at TPC Sawgrass) and then Mike beating Jeff on the back nine by one stroke. First time that has happened in the past 20 years of rounds. A few pics from the Amen Corner holes from Augusta National, the Hogan Bridge and some tee shots around the Blue Monster hole from Doral.

What a 3 yr old boy would buy if he could...

Robert: Mommy would you like a garden drill from the garden drill store? (Note: Drill is now pronouced Deerrreeeelll, with a proper Southern accent.)

Me: Uh, sure Robert. But I'm not sure we need one.

Robert. Oh yes, it can pull weeds. It would be very helpful!


Ah, so good to see the marketing machine working. At least I can be thankful he doesn't know how to pay by credit card yet. Or we would be proud owners of the 'Awesome Auger.'

Kid update

Some recent happenings in our house-

Zoe can now totally remove her diaper. This makes it much easier to poo on the carpet, which apparently is VERY fun and impressive.

She also is loving playing with her bellybutton as she falls asleep. Too bad it doesn't keep her company all night :)


And Robert, my little man. We finally figured out Coocooloco means El Toro Loco. That's a monster truck, you know. I've also learned that the first Bigfoot monster truck was made in 1974 and used as advertisement for a 4x4 shop. My life is so much fuller. :)

If you're planning on visiting, you will be glad to know that Robert is getting much better at actually putting clothes back on after using the potty. More on this another day. You can imagine, I'm sure.

Robert has also decided that Sonic should be eaten EVERY DAY and corn dogs and chocolate milkshakes could solve most of the worlds problems.

Ah the weather...

Let's talk weather.

Since people often ask me (as a non-native) what I think of Houston, here is Part I: The Weather.

Yes, it's hot in the summer. And really, it's not that it's that much hotter. It's not. And sure, it's humid. But the really odd thing about Houston weather, is not the heat. Or the humidity. It's the gray days.

One spring, back when I was a young pup still in college, I remember walking through 'The Quad' (I'm guessing it had 4 buildings around a courtyard? I really have no idea.) It was gray. Grass brown. Trees dormant. Not really raining. Just gray. And it was day 14 of no sun. Hello depressing. Always seemed like forever for the gray to leave. Even winter was somehow gray. The snow always seemed to melt enough to leave a dirty slushy mess of cold ice.

But in Houston, the gray is relief. Those first days of rain in the winter, when the sun finally relents and the clouds gray over are refreshing. And now, it's storm season. This isn't really good, but when you walk out after days of 97F and can breathe the cool misty storm air, you can't help but like the rain. You can almost hear the plants sigh in relief.

It's feast or famine here in the summer though. You're either roasting, or standing in complete wonderment watching day 3 of rain. Maybe that's a Texas thing. They like to do things big.